i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize