I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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