All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
