I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
