Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize
