I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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