It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
