So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
