so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize
