So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
she pinky promised me she was 18
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Randomize
