U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
