Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize