Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I just made out with a guy for $7.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
