I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
NoShamevember. You game?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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