I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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