he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Randomize
