The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
