You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
