remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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