he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
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