Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Randomize
