I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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