He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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