Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
