Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
