That's when you crack a 10am beer
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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