im drinking this country out of the recession.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Randomize
