that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
There's a naked man in my car right now.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
