i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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