dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
