North Korea, Best Korea!
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
