i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
