He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
