And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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