it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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