Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize