Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
