yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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