a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize