i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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