no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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