you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
