I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize