idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
