don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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