she is the kim kardashian of front butts
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
