Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
