You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
