i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
