I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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