He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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