this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
