Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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