I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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